Dating Violence Knowledge from Empower Martial Arts

What is dating violence? When we talk about dating violence we refer to young unmarried couples who have abusive relationships where someone is getting hurt. Many times it is the female being hurt and other times it is just generally violence where both are getting hurt. It is a great problem for all races and economic levels. Some examples of physical abuse are slapping, biting, kicking, throwing things, shoving, choking, and many others. Other forms of abuse include intimidation or threatening, isolation, keeping the partner away from his/her friends, brainwashing, and deprivation with holding necessities.

If your wondering why this is going on you have to look into multiple categories. Some say we just live in a violent society where men with muscles are natural aggressors. Others believe it’s an issue of weaker taboo, alcohol and drugs, lack consequences meaning the consequences are not enough to stop the behavior, and cycle of abuse starting at routine moving to tension then violence and then making up.

Why do they do it and why does the victim stay? Some abusive boyfriends feel as if it is their right to control and dominate “their” woman. Other times it’s a person who has never learned a healthy way to control “bad” feelings—rage, anger, frustration, and jealousy. The biggest reason according to statistics is the abuser has grown up in a abusive home where violence was demonstrated often. They do a great job of playing the cool collected guy in public that everyone wants to be with, thus attracting women especially ones who love to be noticed, but once the relationship goes sexual many males believe the female is his possession.

Women suffer from a cycle where the first incident leaves her in shock and stunned. The male then convinces her it will never happen again and begins abusive patters that slowly become part of the relationship. Note almost all abuse starts only after sex has become part of the picture. The women then begins to lose self esteem after verbal abuse and is to afraid to tell anyone about her situation.

Sadly many cases never get reported, here is what you need to do if you have been abused. Acknowledge your situation and know it’s not healthy, TELL SOMEONE, gain some distance from abuser, get medical, legal, and emotional help, and begin a path towards recovery. The 24-hour domestic violence hotline is 1-(800)-799-SAFE.

For more information on this topic leave a comment below or e-mail tj_holgerson@hotmail.com