Self-Defense Against Dating Violence

Have you or has anyone close to you ever been abused physically, emotionally, verbally, or spiritually by a dating partner? This may not surprise you but the statistics of those being abused in a teen dating relationship is NOT going down.

"Nearly 1.5 million highschool students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year. One in three adolescents in the U.S. is a victim of physical, sexual, emotional or verbal abuse from a dating partner, a figure that far exceeds rates of the other types of youth violence. One in 10 high school students has been purposefully hit, slapped or physically hurt by a boyfriend or girlfriend. One quarter of high school girls have been victims of physical or sexual abuse."

How does Self-Defense come into play?

We're not talking about defending yourself from your dating partner's physical attacks but avoiding it and being aware of thsoe who are abusive. True self-defense is knowledge, being aware of your surroundings, and being prepared for anything. This isn't always just for you but for those close to you as well. You want to strive to be a "peace warrior" or the person who others feel safe around, not just because you know how to knock someone out, but because of your strong leadership qualities and unwavering morals.

EMA is continually working on new ways to educate, raise awareness, and put an end to the many forms of violence that are affecting the community each and every day.



Committed to your Success! Empower Martial Arts Fayetteville, NC

Have you ever started something you were so excited about that you couldn’t sleep? Or bought something you couldn’t keep your mind off of? Many times this excitement is diminished after a period of time due to a lack of direction and encouragement from those around you. Setting goals is great! But are you following through on them or are you just hoping that they will magically be reached?

EMA recognizes that some people are highly self-motivated and others need you to hold their hand every now and then. True strength of character is built in the times when you have “hit the wall”, or lost the initial passion you started with. For instance, take building a model airplane. If someone is expecting it to be done by the time the fair arrives and is calling you to see how everything is coming along, you will finish it because you know how badly you want to display your hard work for all to see. In the same instance, if you are building a model airplane just to have one and no one cares if you finish it, you probably will not finish. And if you do finish, it may take much longer than you anticipated.

At Empower Martial Arts we want to know your goals and exactly what we need to do to insure that you reach them! Accountability is the best way to keep you on track and focused on what you really want. Leave a comment below or e-mail tj_holgerson@hotmail.com for more tips on reaching your goals and building a foundation for success!

Empower Martial Arts Tricking Fayetteville, NC

EMA instructor TJ Holgerson is continuing to practice and learn new elements in one of the fastest growing action sports called Martial Arts Tricking! This is just one of the exciting programs that will push you to the next level in martial arts and fitness.

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Dating Violence Knowledge from Empower Martial Arts

What is dating violence? When we talk about dating violence we refer to young unmarried couples who have abusive relationships where someone is getting hurt. Many times it is the female being hurt and other times it is just generally violence where both are getting hurt. It is a great problem for all races and economic levels. Some examples of physical abuse are slapping, biting, kicking, throwing things, shoving, choking, and many others. Other forms of abuse include intimidation or threatening, isolation, keeping the partner away from his/her friends, brainwashing, and deprivation with holding necessities.

If your wondering why this is going on you have to look into multiple categories. Some say we just live in a violent society where men with muscles are natural aggressors. Others believe it’s an issue of weaker taboo, alcohol and drugs, lack consequences meaning the consequences are not enough to stop the behavior, and cycle of abuse starting at routine moving to tension then violence and then making up.

Why do they do it and why does the victim stay? Some abusive boyfriends feel as if it is their right to control and dominate “their” woman. Other times it’s a person who has never learned a healthy way to control “bad” feelings—rage, anger, frustration, and jealousy. The biggest reason according to statistics is the abuser has grown up in a abusive home where violence was demonstrated often. They do a great job of playing the cool collected guy in public that everyone wants to be with, thus attracting women especially ones who love to be noticed, but once the relationship goes sexual many males believe the female is his possession.

Women suffer from a cycle where the first incident leaves her in shock and stunned. The male then convinces her it will never happen again and begins abusive patters that slowly become part of the relationship. Note almost all abuse starts only after sex has become part of the picture. The women then begins to lose self esteem after verbal abuse and is to afraid to tell anyone about her situation.

Sadly many cases never get reported, here is what you need to do if you have been abused. Acknowledge your situation and know it’s not healthy, TELL SOMEONE, gain some distance from abuser, get medical, legal, and emotional help, and begin a path towards recovery. The 24-hour domestic violence hotline is 1-(800)-799-SAFE.

For more information on this topic leave a comment below or e-mail tj_holgerson@hotmail.com